by Furnishly | Dec 6, 2021 | Design Inspiration, Style
My husband and I are high school sweethearts, and I have fond memories of him surprising me in the morning with hot chocolate in my locker. The gesture always made my 17-year-old heart skip a beat, especially the first time I was greeted by a travel mug and a love note resting on the top of my history textbook. He is a master at finding spur-of-the-moment, everyday gifts to give, that still give me butterflies to this day.
During this time of year, gift-giving can sometimes feel obligatory, as there’s pressure to give loved ones something — anything!— during the holidays. There also seems to be an unspoken rule that you should be giving your partner a large, or especially thoughtful or expensive gift each year. Towards the beginning of our relationship, I saw that my then-boyfriend was visibly stressed trying to figure out what to get me for Christmas. It was the opposite of his care-free, content, everyday-gift-giving self, and honestly, I was feeling that added stress too.
Then one year, we talked about it and decided to take that year off from giving each other a formal present. “Let’s focus on enjoying the holiday together,” I remember us saying. My husband let out a big exhale and agreed. We don’t love each other any less if we don’t do wrapped presents, now we can just focus on spending time with each other.
While we give gifts to our family and friends, my husband and I have created our own rules for ourselves, and our holidays are now a little less stressful, and a little more fun. Instead of making a mad dash to a department store amidst the holiday shopping rush — here is what we do instead.
We Spend Quality Time Together
My husband is a teacher, and I have a seasonal job that keeps me busy during the holidays; as a result, we often don’t see each other during November and December as much as we usually do. What we both want is time spent together, so on our days off, we make sure to schedule time to just relax and be together, and we go on a special holiday date night at our favorite restaurant, too.
Giving experiences is a great way to create quality time if you’re not quite ready to spend the holidays without giving a gift to your partner. Having a winter vacation to look forward to after the holiday season is something my husband and I look forward to. If you’d like to give the gift of quality time, other ideas include tickets to the theater or a sporting event, an Airbnb gift certificate, or a gift certificate to a restaurant they’ve always wanted to try.
We Talk About What We’d Like or Need as a Household
Part of the fun of giving gifts is seeing the surprise on the recipient’s face when they open them. But taking some of the stress off of a typically stressful time is something that my husband and I welcome, and we take time to check in with one another and ask, is there anything you’d like for Christmas? Or even better, we discuss if there’s anything we’d like for Christmas that we can both enjoy.
One year, we decided to give each other a bunch of small gifts, and I ended up with a lot of things I didn’t end up using or even wanted, and vice versa. We realized that we were both more concerned about the quantity of the gifts we were giving, and not the quality. Now, we are both open and transparent about what our wants and needs are over the holidays. We are both mindful of not wanting to create clutter in our one-bedroom apartment, plus, we anticipate receiving gifts from our family and friends, so we’re really able to decide if there’s anything we’d like to receive from each other.
We Shop Intentionally Together for Our Loved Ones
For better or for worse, gifts are a big part of the holidays, so my husband and I enjoy focusing our attention on our friends and family. We discuss what we think our loved ones would like, and if our schedules allow, we shop and wrap the gifts together, too. We are not always perfect and some years we’ve ended up scrambling, but we always end up giving gifts we’re happy with.
Deciding on what to give our family and friends is another way we spend time together, and it’s our way of celebrating the season as a couple. Ultimately, the joy we feel comes from being together and giving to others — which is, in its own way, a gift in and of itself.
by Furnishly | Dec 3, 2021 | Design Inspiration, Style
We independently select these products—if you buy from one of our links, we may earn a commission.
Name: Joshua and Angela along with a Great Dane named Hank, Clyde the mastiff, and Luna (aka Tuna) our cat, though they have been behind on their rent!
Location: Springfield, Missouri
Size: 1,104 square feet
Type of Home: House
Years lived in: 11 years, owned
Photographer and prop stylist Angela Houska and her husband Joshua Widner’s home is like a cabinet of curiosities. The house’s layout has a great flow that invites guests to move through the rooms slowly, almost as if they are on a museum visit, making it an ideal abode to show off their collections. A self-described “collector,” Angela is known for scouring flea market shelves and curating items for her Depop shop, Sol Sister Vintage. As for the goods she keeps for herself, she has a knack for seeing potential in sometimes unassuming tchotchkes, giving them new life with a little buff or paint. Joshua is an entrepreneur with a keen eye for design himself. His cafés and bars are well-known locally for quality drinks and fare, but also for their aesthetic charm.
“Our house was built in 1925; we love the original crown molding and overall charm of the home,” Angela wrote. “It’s in a great location, within walking distance of our favorite coffee shop.” Though Joshua and Angela spent eleven years in their collection-filled first house, they have recently moved on to their next dream home: a custom house with dreamy architectural details.
Apartment Therapy Survey:
My Style: We have a bohemian and Scandinavian style with an emphasis on feeling comfortable and cozy. We love natural textiles and vintage pieces.
Inspiration: We take inspiration from any and everywhere; mostly from our travels, nature, art, and Angela’s vintage finds.
Favorite Element: Our favorite element in our home would have to be the kitchen. We love to host and entertain and the kitchen is where all the magic happens.
Biggest Challenge: A challenge for us would be the live-in remodel phases. Learning how to live among the chaos that happens with a remodel can be overwhelming, especially with two big dogs. We overcome that by spending time outdoors as much as we can.
Proudest DIY: Our proudest DIY would be the kitchen! Joshua’s grandfather is an incredible carpenter and made all of the open shelving. (At 81 years young, by the way.) He also helped us bust down a wall to open the space up. We had so much fun with him and with the Beatles spinning on repeat during the entire kitchen reno.
Biggest Indulgence: We splurged a bit in the kitchen on appliances; adding a new fridge and a dishwasher, which was a total game changer after many of Friendsgivings having gone without.
Is there something unique about your home or the way you use it? We were able to convert the spare bedroom into a walk-in closet. Traditional 1920s homes have little to no closet space. We designed custom shelving units to better suit our needs and the space.
And with no room for a pantry, we utilized the old microwave cubby as a space for food storage.
What are your favorite products you have bought for your home and why? We love our Feit Smart LED light bulb in the living room. It connects with your wifi and can be controlled from anywhere via your smartphone. It allows you to get your lighting just right and you can get creative with changing the colors.
Please describe any helpful, inspiring, brilliant, or just plain useful small space maximizing and/or organizing tips you have: We love all things beautiful and useful. Yamazaki Home has some amazing storage solutions that are functional and also easy on the eyes. Like these magnetic fridge spice racks! I (Angela) also enjoyed making our spices more aesthetically appealing by using my DyMo and glass jars with wooden lids.
Finally, what’s your absolute best home secret or decorating advice? Make good lighting a priority. Proper lighting has the capacity to create a good atmosphere much more than most furniture or decor can. The right lighting can totally transform a space and impacts overall feeling and mood. We live by the rule that our home feels the best at 20% luminosity, so dim those lights and supplement with candles or lamps with warm LEDs.
Thanks, Joshua and Angela!
This house tour’s responses were edited for length and clarity.
by Furnishly | Dec 3, 2021 | Design Inspiration, Style
Kara Nesvig
Contributor
Kara Nesvig grew up on a sugar beet farm in rural North Dakota and did her first professional interview with Steven Tyler at age 14. She has written for publications including Teen Vogue, Allure and Wit & Delight. She lives in an adorable 1920s house in St. Paul with her husband, their Cavalier King Charles Spaniel Dandelion and many, many pairs of shoes. Kara is a voracious reader, Britney Spears superfan and copywriter — in that order.
Follow Kara
by Furnishly | Dec 2, 2021 | Design Inspiration, Style
While store-bought presents are definitely nice, it’s pretty difficult to top a thoughtful DIY gift. For one, you get the chance to get crafty and stretch your creative muscles. Most importantly, though, DIY gifting gives you the chance to show some extra effort, love, and care — things pretty much everyone craves during the holiday season. (Not to mention, DIY gifts are typically far more memorable than something you could quickly snag at Target.)
If you’re interested in making DIY gifts this year and a little stumped on where to start, Apartment Therapy staffers have you covered. From personalized recipe cards to limoncello to compiling special letters into one snazzy book, there is bound to be a DIY gift below to get you thinking about how to make something great for a friend or family member in your own life. Below are the best DIY gifts AT staffers ever received (or given).
Coupons for Little Favors
Associate Style Editor Savannah West is a big fan of creating DIY coupon books, especially for her mom. “My brother and I used to give my mom a couple of coupons for little favors. One year, we gave her a book of 30 [to] 40!” she says. You can make these coupons specific to the person you’re gifting, as well as your relationship with them — such as that kids will cook dinner after the parent has had a long day at work. “These are always fun to make and she always appreciated them,” Savannah says, noting that you can buy pre-made coupon books at your local bookstore if you don’t feel that crafty, or you can DIY with printer or construction paper and plenty of markers.
A Cookbook that Tells a Story
Do you have someone special in your life who belongs on “Top Chef”? Perhaps gift them with a DIY cookbook! “My friend’s mom was an amazing cook, so [she] reached out to people who are friends with her mom and asked for recipes that reminded them of her mom,” explains Audience Growth Assistant Editor Keats Iwanaga. “My friend then put [the recipes] all into a book together. The end result was a really sweet, homemade cookbook that was more about the stories than the recipes and how she’d impacted each of our lives.” Feel free to get extra crafty and add illustrations, collages, or photos of you and your loved one together for a special touch.
A Kit for Homemade Tea or Coffee
Another cooking-themed DIY gift idea is to give a coffee or tea aficionado all the ingredients they need to make a cozy, warm, and delicious drink at home. Managing Editor Terri Pous once received a handwritten recipe card for Dishoom’s chai, all ingredients included. For an added bonus, you could throw in a DIY cup coffee koozie, too!
A Cozy Blanket or Loungewear
When asked about the best DIY gift she has been given, Editorial Assistant Sarah Everett had to go with a knitted blanket a friend once made for her. “It is enormous, so soft, and one of best gifts I’ve ever gotten,” she says.
Graphic Designer Monique Litombe, on the other hand, loves to give the gift of cozy. “My mom and I crochet. She gives me blankets which are nice to cherish,” she says, adding that she has crocheted loungewear for friends. Whether you already have the skill or want to brush up on it, this is a great way to get those hours in.
The best DIY gift Social Media Editor Rachel Otero ever received was a homemade candle from her best friend. You can get extra personalized and decorate the jar that holds it, too. Homemade candles are also extremely easy and inexpensive to create. This tutorial will guide you through.
Signature Treats and Sweets
You can’t go wrong with some sweets. “My cousin makes amazing fudge and I always look forward to it. One is minty and it’s one of my favorite things in the world,” says Real Estate Editor Madeline Bilis.
If fudge isn’t your thing, some type of bread is always a great go-to as well. “My mom typically makes date bread. She always packages it up and it’s very tasty,” says Senior SEO Manager Brenda Schmerl. Banana bread, pumpkin bread, or zucchini bread are also yummy options.
If you want to get even more creative, News & Culture Director Tara Bellucci recommends giving homemade jams, while former Lifestyle Director Taryn Williford recommends a surprising option. “One year, a friend made limoncello,” shares Taryn, adding that the process is “surprisingly easy but felt very luxe.”
Time is a precious commodity — and if you have the bandwidth, sometimes you can offer your services as an unofficial party planner. Lifestyle Editor Ella Cerón knows this well. “My friends know that if they want to do something for their birthday, or if they hit a milestone or got a new job, they just need to give me an email list,” she says of her second life as the party planner in her friend group. “I’ll make the reservations, order the cake, and generally do the work for them.”
Bonus: If you’re the kind of person who loves picking the restaurant, you might even delight in doing the work. Just be sure it’s a spot your recipient will enjoy.
Personalized Illustrations
Illustrations are a wonderful DIY and extremely easy to personalize. For example, if someone in your life is a pet owner and you have the artistic skill set, surprise ‘em with a portrait of their furry friend. This is what House Tours Adrienne Breaux would love to receive (and give). “If you have any artistic skills, send me a picture you’ve drawn of any of my animals. So sweet, and doesn’t need to be commissioned from Etsy, I will frame and love it. I will try to do the same.”
Shopping Style Editor Blair Donovan also loves personalized illustrations. If the person you have in mind doesn’t have a pet, think about illustrating one of their favorite hobbies, drinks, or places. For example, if your friend lives in New York City and has a favorite coffee hangout, draw the outside of that building as best you can. Big red wine fan? Try your hand at illustrating their favorite pinot noir.
A Compilation Book of Special Emails and Memories
Finally, compiling special memories in one place is a perfectly sentimental way to show how much you care and admire someone special in your life. “For big occasions, my dad got a bunch of emails and letters. My mom collected them and put them in a binder and he keeps it on his bookshelf,” says Home Projects Editor Megan Baker. If you can’t get a hold of emails or letters, think photos from big events, old birthday cards, or even newspaper clippings of important moments in their life.
by Furnishly | Nov 18, 2021 | Design Inspiration, Style
We independently select these products—if you buy from one of our links, we may earn a commission.
Whether you love grocery shopping or would rather spend an hour in the dentist’s chair, one thing’s for certain: We can all stand to be a little more strategic about our grocery budgets. Unless, maybe, you’re a financial expert? Yeah, financial experts probably know a thing or three about keeping a balanced budget and a pantry full of food. They’re experts, after all! So I chatted with two money bloggers to get their best tips. Here’s what they had to suggest.
Calculate how much you actually spend on groceries … and look for patterns.
Lots of resources will try to tell you how much you should spend on groceries. The USDA even publishes monthly food plans with averages. But budgets aren’t one-size-fits-all, explains Bola Sokunbi, the founder and CEO of Clever Girl Finance and author of the Clever Girl Finance book series. So while it may seem like a good idea to create a budget based on an aspirational number, that tactic likely won’t be sustainable. A budget “should be based on the foods you eat and how many people you are preparing meals for,” she says, adding that the national monthly average spent on groceries ($387) may be totally off-base for you and your household.
Here’s what you should do instead, according to Sokunbi: First, determine how much you actually spend on groceries over the course of a few weeks. Laura Dempster, the founder and blogger behind The Thrifty Londoner, agrees: “Once you start tracking your grocery spending for a few weeks, you’ll soon start to see patterns emerge.” You may start to see that it makes more sense to buy certain things in bulk or that shopping for generic for something could save you money.
Meal planning really is so important. With a meal plan in place, you’re less likely to panic and order costly takeout. A meal plan can also help you when it comes time to grocery shop — mostly because it will ensure that you only buy things you’ll use.
Sokunbi makes use of a meal plan every week, explaining that the intricate planning helps her identify exactly what to put on her grocery list, including items she may be running low on, like spices. That’s crucial to making this tip work for you: Think beyond the perishable items (fish, eggs, meat, produce, or dairy) on your meal plan and do a quick sweep of your cabinets with the week’s recipes in hand. Don’t forget to factor in school lunches when you meal plan, too.
This way, you’re also less likely to have to run to the store for “just one thing” because we all know that ends up being five or six things.
Grocery shop in the middle of the week.
Grocery stores can be zoo-like during the weekends — especially at popular places, like Trader Joe’s. But doing your weekly shopping trip on a Tuesday evening won’t just make for a better experience, it could help you save cash, too. Sokunbi notes that grocery stores tend to offer better deals and discounts during the week, as they get ready to turn over products for the rush of weekend traffic.
Think twice about items nearing their expiration dates.
Of course it’s smart shopping to buy reduced-price items that are close to their expiration or “sell-by” dates. But Dempster is skeptical of this practice, and notes that the expiration can be within days of purchase. While food doesn’t automatically become inedible when those dates come around, Dempster has found that these “great deals” often end up going to waste in her refrigerator, because she doesn’t have time to eat or cook with them.
Actually, think twice about all sales.
You’ve probably heard this before: It’s only a deal if you need it. If you pick up buy-one-get-one-free cookies, but didn’t plan on buying cookies, then you did not save money. Dempster says, “Go in with a list and don’t stray from it or else you can end up spending more than originally intended.“
Skip the corner stores when possible.
“Corner stores tend to be more expensive because of the convenience factor, so it’s best to avoid these when possible,” says Sokunbi. That said, for some shoppers, corner stores and small shops are the only option available. In that case, it may be helpful to use an online grocery service (see tip number 8!). The takeaway here, from Sokunbi, is that convenience stores should be used largely in case of “I’m out of milk and halfway through a recipe” emergencies.
Don’t be afraid to return items.
It’s happened to the best of us: You feel a sudden pang of buyer’s remorse when unpacking impulse purchases after a grocery trip. Don’t beat yourself up, but do head back to the store ASAP. “Immediately return [the unplanned purchases] so you can salvage your budget,” says Sokunboi. Of course, any item you mean to return should be unopened, with the seal intact. Can’t make a return? Sokunbi skips takeout or restaurant meals to course-correct — even if she’d originally worked them into that week’s or month’s budget.
You’ll need to pay a little extra for groceries delivered to your door, but this tactic is a budget saver for Dempster, who lives in a city and does not have a car. “I get an online delivery about once a month.” she explains. “This includes bulk items such as rice, pasta, and things I can’t easily carry home, but use constantly. I then top up throughout the week with fresh foods.”
There’s another key to this tip’s success: Grocery shopping online can help you manage impulse or emotional purchases, especially if you’ve got your budget document open in the next tab over.
Rochelle Bilow
Contributor
Rochelle Bilow is a graduate of the French Culinary Institute, the former social media manager at Bon Appétit Magazine and Cooking Light Magazine. She has also worked as a cook on a small farm in Central New York, and a Michelin-starred restaurant in New York City. Connect with her @rochellebilow.
